I can't watch the news anymore. I don't know if this makes me a terrible person, but to me, it just seems like there are too many terrible things in the world to cope with. In some ways, I have been insanely lucky. I missed both the earthquake in Chile and the one in NZ, but have been put through that horrible agonising wait for information on people twice now. Again, I am lucky that no one close to me was killed, but this time round it has been people I know hurt or trapped, parents killed, and houses destroyed. I am lucky it wasn't worse. But people here don't understand that this was a devastating event in NZ. Then something like the Japan earthquake hits, and I just can't watch. I can't feel for them too, and then I feel guilty and selfish.

Then the phone goes, and it is my Mum. She never rings me, only when something bad happens. So I know something bad has happened, and she informs me a friend has passed away. It just seems like the black clouds never clear, and everyday there is more thunder and rain. I believe that good people, who live with positive energy get the positive energy back, so where is the sunshine? I could really use some.